How to Fail on Your Way to Success

Fear of failure is one of the biggest obstacles on our way to success. As you probably know, every major achievement is preceded by more than one failure.

When you try and it doesn't work out, you fail because you don't yet know how to do it. But that can change.

It starts with becoming aware of, and accepting, how much you still don't know, so you can make room for learning. After all, none of us can know everything about everything 🙂.

You can learn something new every day and work hard to become a true professional in your field. Only then will you know exactly what to do and how to do it, so that failure is no longer an option.

Thomas Edison left us some valuable lessons about success and failure:

• Accept failure;
• Never give up;
• Work hard;
• Find a better way of doing things;
• Keep trying until you succeed;
• Learn and improve wherever needed so you don't fail the same way next time;
• Stay focused on one thing until you see it through. (my favorite)

When we talk about failure, we're really talking about the lessons we learn from our mistakes, how well we apply those lessons in future attempts, and how quickly we get back up after a setback.

IBM founder Thomas Watson said that the way to double your success rate is to double your failure rate. It might sound strange, but making a mistake means you tried, that you worked, and that you genuinely gave it your best effort.

When you're afraid of failure, you stop taking risks, you lose your initiative, and that's exactly what pushes you toward failure.
There's no way to develop your creativity except through trial and error. When you see and accept that you're making mistakes, you create the opportunity to learn and improve.

I know it's often hard to recognize and own up to having failed — to admit that you didn't know, that you could have done better and didn't. That's a trait of perfectionists in general 🙂

I still smile remembering how, back in school, I'd be flooded with nerves whenever a teacher pointed out my mistakes. Many times I even chose not to answer questions, even when I knew the answer, for fear of saying something wrong.

I'm not exactly a model example when it comes to failure. I'd say most of my personal, professional, relationship, and social projects started out with failure. In some cases I kept at it long enough to realize I hadn't actually learned anything, since I kept repeating the same mistake.

But you know what?

That taught me patience and tempered me. I learned that good things come through hard work and dedication, and that through learning, you can really achieve anything.

I've learned my biggest lessons from my biggest mistakes.

That seems to be how I've operated so far. I'm convinced there's another way too, and I'm working on finding it. When I do, I'll write about it 🙂

Looking back, all I can say is that I needed those experiences — first, to discover myself; to satisfy my curiosity (I'm a fairly curious person by nature :)); to learn how we function as human beings; and to mature.

But one of the most interesting lessons was this:

When you have no other choice, you have to make things work! 🙂

As if you only have one life you're sure exists. So you'll have to live it, and you'll have to actually enjoy it too, because you don't know how long it will last. So do something! 😄

So if you catch yourself saying: "I can't take it anymore", "I quit", "there's no point trying anymore, it's not going to work out anyway" — take a break 🙂.
Once you've let off some steam and relaxed, you'll see things through different eyes. Above all, you'll know what matters most to you right now, what your values and principles are, and whether what you're doing actually aligns with them.

In the end, it comes down to how long you dwell on failure, how long you choose to sit there feeling sorry for yourself, and when you decide to move on with the lesson you've learned.
I'm curious — what have you learned from your own mistakes, and how did you get past them?
Maybe we can learn some new strategies together 🙂

With love,

Raluca

photo credit: ra2 studio – Fotolia